Human Psychology

   I just want to tap into Human Psychology. If you ask me what recession proof job is for next generation I would say three career options – Priests, Entertainment business and Psychologists. The way world is shaping up I have 100% confidence these three careers will be safe bet. Rise of temples, priests, Poojas; Gigantic rise of standup comedies like Evam standup Tamasha; Steady rise of Physiatrists, Counselors in every place are just standing examples to reiterate my above statement. Okay now coming to Human Psychology it is very interesting aspect and want to pen five little aspects which I have come across in my day to day life

[1] Keeping watch faster than actual time: Almost all of us do this…we tend to keep our watches 5 or 10 minutes faster than actual time. Now the million-dollar question? Is it going to make any difference to do that knowing you have kept 10 minutes faster? Looks like human mind is prone to be more effective once it sees time nearing deadline. So when actual time is 7.50 am and you have kept as 8 am it is going to drive you to be more agile and effective and mind may not interpret about factual information. But for lazy gooses no matter you change AM to PM it won’t make any difference.

[2] 999 INR versus 1000 INR: It is so funny when the price tag quotes 999 rupees only and not 1000 as if one rupee is going to fetch you an apartment in R.A Puram, Chennai; But this practice is an age old phenomenon and the very act of making the customer say “Nine hundred and” versus “One thousand” makes a psychological difference amongst buyers since it sounds cheaper. This is like a team scoring 299 in 50 overs versus making 300 where commentators end up saying psychologically it is a positive thing to touch 300 score.

[3] Success and its perspective: I watched movie “Vinaithaandi Varuvaaya” on the day it got released and liked the movie but many felt other way round and once the movie was declared success the very same people said movie was good. I just think the success of the movie had an influence in their thought process. Same thing happened for me with ‘Kaaka Kaaka’ which I watched way back in 2003 and completely did not like the movie but once it was declared blockbuster and me watching the movie second time I had a different taste altogether. So human mind gets influenced sub consciously based on history.

[4] Mind and Occurrence: When you see something that is out of ordinary then automatically message goes to brain prompting us to take a picture. Take for example, you spot Mr.Obama on the roadside and it is very natural for you to take a picture alongside him. Now let us say you spot Mr.Obama almost daily would you still take a picture? It is the same person but you may not be prompted to take one since human mind may not value it the same way like the first occurrence. All I can think of is when I used to trip India for my 3 weeks vacation and end up eating in Plantain leaves I used to give my phone and have a stranger take a pic of me since it used to be a rare occurrence but nowadays I don’t even carry my phone when I am in pandhi. On a different note nowadays if I end up having a sandwich then I do want to take a picture.

[5] Message and not the messenger: People like Rajinikanth or Sachin have attained heights of success, name, fame etc., but still appreciation is something they love to have. Rajinikanth has habit of disguising in public and visits theatres in Chennai to enjoy his own movies amongst fans since claps, whistle is something that keeps him going. Similarly Sachin requested BCCI to shift venue of his final international match to Mumbai as he wants to sign off from his home ground and enjoy the love, appreciation from his fans. But when it comes to criticism nobody wants to take it or people atleast do not have the mindset to take it. I would point out because they focus on the messenger and not the message. When someone is criticizing if people look into the message that would take it to the next point of discussion but if people focus purely on messenger then it just creates enmity. Once again I feel it is the mindset in how people handle criticism and work towards betterment of their own self.

Divorce !!

   ‘Divorce’ is one term which used to be an alien word in those days is become a very common term in modern world. Even conservative community like mine is no exception. I wanted to pen my thoughts on this topic especially after seeing Soundarya Rajinikanth marriage recently.  Misunderstanding, Difference of opinion are not something new but it existed in the past too; Only thing is people used to have a mindset of letting go things easily in olden days or at least one of them tend to take things easy. In modern day number one question is who is that person who tend to take it easy? Husband or wife ? Problem starts there…..”Who” comes before everything. Also the society we live in has something to do with Divorce – the movies that we watch, the serials we see, celebrity we love has an indirect impact in how we see relationship.

    Now let me shift focus to Soundarya Rajinikanth’s recent marriage. Whole of Tamil Nadu was going gaga over her marriage, electronic and print media had wonderful time making headlines, so many people congratulated her on her bold move to come out of the shell and express her happiness over second marriage, she gave Interview which was well received, etc., Well as a human being I wish her happy married life and definitely congratulate her on her move to shed inhibition and come out bold. Now my only question is was there a single soul who thought about Ashwin Ramkumar who was her former husband? Again I have no clue why did they seperate and that is not the scope of my blog too. But let us not forget Ashwin Ramkumar is the biological dad of Ved. I wish both Ashwin and Soundarya happiness on their second innings but what Soundarya cannot hide is she is daughter of India’s superstar. If Rajinikanth endorses a brand the company may go public, anything and everything Rajinikanth does becomes news. She was fine to move on with her life with second marriage but she trying to make a statement in public is what I think is wrong as I believe she may mislead some people with humble background. How many people we know who had second marriage and they kept things very simple by having a low key ceremony. The love and affection from media is all overrated and one has to come to a consensus that true love and affection doesn’t need any media attention. Ashwin also got married but where was all the media ? I feel sorry for Ashwin since it must be emotionally tough to be away from his son. So setting everything aside I wish Ashwin as well as Soundarya-Vishagan a very happy married life. Let Ved get all the love he deserves …

 Now coming to general public, top two reasons I hear reasons for divorce:

(a)    Girl too independent: People say girls earn these days and they want independent life and cannot adjust with inlaws. My opinion is this differs case to case ….People evolve through time. Comparing everything to those days may no longer work …Look at Nirmala Seetharaman, if her hubby thought that way we wouldn’t have got a lady Finance Minister; Modern day girls are ultra smart as they can multi task, they tend to have MK handbag as well know how to make Milagu Kolambu. It is true that with knowledge and freedom comes Stubbornness and attitude but if that can be handled internally within husband and wife with no intervention from both parents then that should be a decent ride with little bumps.

(b)    Boy is impotent: This is one strange thing that people come up with. Just like if you have no time to cook a dish then you come up with either Upma or Maggi ..similarly if they have no reason then they take this one as an excuse. So should boy show Testosterone test results ? This is ridiculous and spreading these sorts of rumors are disheartening.

   Now Finally why am I coming with this blog? Well as being part of society let us respect folks who are undergoing this emotionally draining process called ‘Divorce’. It could be the Bride/Groom, parents of both sides, siblings etc., If we are closer to the party in question we can offer help else we may just have to leave them alone and maybe pray for them to come out of that stage. It is very natural that Boy's side complain girl and Girl's side complain Boy but only God knows the truth. Problem is folks undergoing the process should co-exist in the same society and they are prone to meet people from all walks of life. Sometimes little things like lending a helping hand, taking them out for a movie, giving some moral support without touching the subject can inject so much of life into their life. Remember one thing – doing help alone is not help, wanting to do help can also be help.